How to Pull the Knife Out of Your Back

Have you ever said something stupid?  I have.  Maybe you spoke out of turn? Let something slip that you shouldn’t have?  I did.  I also know some pretty smart folks that have done the same.    What did you do?  Humbly apologized, I hope.  I also offered to do what I could to make it better, sans excuses.

It doesn’t always work, right?  We all make mistakes but sometimes you’re still at the mercy of the maturity on the other side of the table.  Granted, some open-mouth-insert-foot moments are worse than others.  Forgiveness can take time.

Here are 3.5 tips for how to act when you’re the one that got “dissed”…

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Julia Allison and the reason i need to keep doing this blog

So, I imagine I owe Ms. Allison some credit for providing me inspiration.  I’ve struggled with whether or not anyone is really interested in a blog about character and principles. See my post Principled Rant, 8/13/2005.

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I picked up a recent copy of Wired with Julia on the cover.  She knows how to garner attention and readership.  She’s eye candy with no accomplishment other than infamy.  And, the article discussing her tactics was an interesting approach – advice on how you, too, can do the same.

Here I am giving little, albeit more, web cred to Julia.  It is in the interest of sharing that there is a better, more character based road to travel.  There is a more generous means of establishing connections to others.  And that’s the discussion i hope to foster.

Wouldn’t it be great to build the same kind of audience and following for interest in how to be more effective through Integrity?  Harmony?  Focus? and having a purpose!

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Sonny Rollins Saxophone Colossus

Rollins200x150Sonny Rollins turned 75 not long before his performance this week at the UC Davis Mondavi Center. As is typically the case, my wife Liz purchased tickets to see Sonny and his band some six months prior to the concert.  Funny how when the day rolls around, even after looking forward to it for months, we were distracted by parenting, chores, and the absence of energy for a cultural outing.  We got angry with each other in the car not long after leaving our home.  Our argument lasted and nearly ruined the evening.

Our lack of harmony met the odd confrontation of walking into the hallowed church of the arts where we were about to see one of the finest, most talented musicians to grace our good planet.  The inspiration unfolded as a mirror to my foolishness.  What focus and power this man represents after more than fifty years of honing and practicing his craft.  I share this description from John Ellis (also a wonderful saxophone player that Sonny Rollins influenced):

“The term “organic” is used a lot in music. I think Sonny bestRollins defines
what that means–he’s an organic improviser. Listening to him is like
watching the sun rise or the trees grow. It never sounds forced, and
each idea develops from the next one. On top of that he has so much
humor and spirit–you can feel his eyes twinkle–or maybe it’s behind
his eyes, a sparkle, as if he’s amused by each phrase he discovers. And
it certainly sounds like every phrase is a discovery. He also has the
funkiest feel for time, but it’s really flexible. And his articulation,
like a drum. And his sound is beautiful, incredibly warm and direct–it
reaches out and envelops you.”

Seeing Sonny play the saxophone would cause most fans to be
introspective, but you have to be in harmony with yourself and your environment to allow the influence to wash
over you. The experience “sharpened my saw” in emotional and spiritual ways.  It also to reminded me to focus on what is truly important.

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